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The Pyro Report/Episode 1
Pyro: Heeeeeeello, ladies and gents, and welcome to the Pyro Report! It's the pilot episode!
- plane sounds*
Hey, not that way.
Well, I'll start off by introducing our cast.
Lololo: Hi, suckers! I got on this show because I float in the air!
Lalala: And I got on because I was related to Lololo!
Pyro: Well, these guys are Lololo & Lalala, two cool Kirby bosses.
Lololo: Kirby bosses? We have no authority over the lump!
Lalala: It's a marshmallow.
Pyro: Kirby is a Star Warrior and he is a boy.
Lololo: Anime canon alert!
Lalala: RAISE THE SECTION.
Pyro: Wait, wha-*smashed by logo*
Lololo: So, this is the section where we talk about the Kirby anime and rant about how the American dub put F's in our names!
Lalala: Today's episode will be Waddle While You Work. In this episode, King Dedede gets a robot and fires all the Waddle Dees. The robot can make tea inside of it.
Lololo: I can't see why Dedede even thought of drinking the robot's tea, because who knows where the hell the tea came from.
Lololo: This episode is full of cute and cuddly Waddle Dee action, and, as Blade Knight put it "dere's thousands of 'em!"
The robot kicks them all out :(
Lalala: The Waddle Dees go to a nearby cave, and Kirby and Tiff and Tuff-
Lololo: AND AND AND AND AND AND
Lalala: Oh, shut up.
Lololo: Well, they all sleep in a cave, which Kirby witnesses, and it's so damn cute!
Lalala: Stop stealing-
Lololo: -my sentances.
Lalala: So, Kirby forgets to turn the flash off on the camera, and all the Waddle Dees go apeshit over the flash.
Lololo: Kirby escapes, and he shows his blurry pictures to the others. Only one picture gave them vital information, but if Tiff deleted the images of cute Waddle Dees going apeshit, I will kill the bastard.
Lalala: We really need to watch our language.
Lololo: Eventually, the robot robs D3 and Escargoon of their money and sends it to Customer Service to forcefully pay of their debts.
Lalala: Then the robot wants to kill them.
Lololo: And the Waddle Dees save them and get hired again.
Lololo: This episode gets a 10/10 because the Waddle Dees are so damn cute and only the robot hates them throughout the episode.
Lalala: This has been Kirby Anime Reviews, and fuck Pyro!
Lololo: Make sure he didn't hear us.
Pyro: Alright, after that, I'll intorduce you to NSM.
Pyro: And Lakituthequick.
Pyro: And our other two employees-
GP: GODZILLAS AWESOME GODZILLAS AWESOME
Waddle Dee: SHUT UPPPPP
Pyro: -GalacticPetey and Waddle Dee.
GP: Hey everybody how's it going.
Waddle Dee: If I had a dime for every time GP said that Godzilla's awesome...I'd have 4 dimes.
LTQ: Yeah, so much money.
Waddle Dee: I know right?
GP: MY SPRITES ARE HUGE
Lololo: ...you don't say?
NSM: Wait, where did the blue and pink things come from?
Lalala: A cabbage patch.
Lololo: CABBAGE PATCH DOLLS
Pyro: They're not things. They're whatchamacallits!
Lalala: ...I thought we were boozledangers.
NSM: I thought you were retards!
Pyro: ...Alright, let's get this over with and bring in our first special guest...
Pyro: No, I didn't feel like bringing him in first.
GutsehMan: AW SHIT.
Pyro: Today's special guest is Nabber!
Nabber: Hey guys.
Pyro: Alright, let's sit in the chairs- wait what?
Pyro:...get out of the damn chairs you two.
Lololo: But we spent ours spriting ourselves onto these chairs!
GP: Hey, Firefox's spellcheck made "spriting" into "stripping"! Woah!
Lalala: Sorry, we don't have clothes.
Nabber: Oh shit my purity has been ruined.
Pyro: So, Nabber, I have a question for you...WHY DO YOU LIKE THE CRAP THAT IS CORALINE
Nabber: HEY SHUT UP CORALINE IS A AWESOME MOVIE I STILL WANT THE BUTTON FAD
Pyro: CORALINE SUCKS
Nabber: NO IT DOESNT
Pyro: GO FUCK YOURSELF
Nabber: WHAT THE HELL I'M LEAVING
NSM: Oh, way to go, Pyro.
Pyro: Oh, shut up.
GP: You better not tell Smasher to fuck himself in the next episode.
Lololo: Isn't the special guest supposed to be a secret.
Lalala: Well, Google said it.
Pyro: Wait a second, Lalala. That's not Google.
LTQ: Oh no.
GP: SHUT OFF THE CAMERAS SHUT OFF THE CAMERAS
Pyro: LALALA I ORDER YOU TO STOP LOOKING AT POR-
LTQ: So, Pyro, how much are we getting paid for this?
Pyro: I haven't really thought about this. Eh, maybe a candy bar for everyone?
LTQ: ...What did you say?
Pyro: Oh shit.